Can a broken relationship be rebuilt?
It’ll be hard to rebuild a failed relationship, but not impossible. It may take many days or even months to accomplish.
It’s upsetting when your once budding relationship takes a wrong turn. Coping with relationship loss can be particularly difficult if the couple has relied on each other as best friends. By having limited options to confide in, the ‘newly’ single person may feel lonely, and frustrated. You didn’t see it coming. the realization that “it’s over” just hit you and it hurts.
However, rebuilding a broken relationship requires few things, most importantly, both partners must want to fix it in order for it to work. One sided effort in a relationship, is a romantic concept which exists only in fictions. A real life relationship is a team-work. Only one person trying, cannot fix a broken relationship. Both need to want it.
Relationships aren’t easy, too many couples throw it into the mud prematurely, only to repeat the same dysfunctional patterns in their next relationship. Most couples can last long term if they’re both committed to working on it, but the problem is that one or both of the parties believe an issue is insurmountable. The basics of any healthy relationship is, mutual admiration, mutual respect, high self esteem, shared sense of purpose and transparency.
Building any failed relationship takes time, it’s basically a “fresh” start , so don’t expect to experience same level of intimacy and closeness you once had. Give it time and be very patient. Patience, because there is no surity that things would work again. So try not to expect much. Try not to bring things that happened in past, as this would make it more difficult to restore. Try to earn that trust factor, which was lost.
Some of the simple yet very effective ways in which you can fix your broken relationship.
- First you have to know what has made the relationship go sour – Is this relationship worth saving? Do I even want to try? You have to take inventory of the good and bad times and realize that rebuilding it can take a lot of work! Consider if it’s worth it to work for the relationship in spite of whatever hardships doing so might present.
- You can’t do it by yourself and both of you have to be committed! That means you both have to want it and you can’t point finger as to whose fault it was in the first place because you are trying to get a fresh start!
- Email or text him or her once (only once) and all you’d have to say is, “I’m willing to talk if you change your mind”. Then you have to leave him or her alone and let them think about it. Do not bug the person under any circumstances. If they come back, great, and if they don’t, you probably would have lost him or her anyway.
- If there is any hope and your partner is willing to make an effort with you, seek help from someone who will help you work through your issues methodically and with expertise. Just like you would deal with a broken down car. First, you need to determine what the problem is and unless you are a mechanic, that means taking it to someone who specializes in broken down cars so he or she can tell you what needs to be repaired. Both parties need to attend counseling to learn new tools in handling problems in their personal relationship. After that, you need to invest time into repairing the problem. It’s oftentimes the inability to handle personal problems that kills a relationship. Over time, as the two of you address the underlying issues and put effort into changing things that can be changed, you should see that broken down relationship begin to run more smoothly again.
- If you don’t have the means to get couple’s therapy, try doing easy things that might be fun for both of you. This will really help since you will likely be presented with many opportunities during your time together to fall in love with each other again. Do things with your partner like participating in their hobbies with them and inviting them to participate in your hobbies or just going out and spending quality time with them doing things that are fun. It’s easy to enjoy being around someone when you’re both having fun.
- Don’t stick to the same old routine, embrace some change. When you already have a broken relationship, carrying forward everything that happened in the past, in the same manner, won’t fix it. Yes, change can be intimidating, but you need to prepare yourself for an emotional transition and move things in a positive direction to mend your relationship. It’s for the best.
There are three magical steps to follow for saving any relationship-
Respect, understanding and good communication.
Three things to avoid are–
Negligence, destrust and over possessiveness.
Stay calm and be positive. Do not try too hard. If after trying and nothing falls into place then let it go, something better is waiting for you. So chill and be happy.
Read this beautiful book Relationship-Cure-
It Reveals the key elements of healthy relationships, emphasizing the importance of “emotional connection”